Tuesday, March 20, 2007

You want me to do what ?

The setting - the building site of the auditorium, on my way from 5th to 6th lesson.

Builder Guy - Hey ! Are you a teacher here ?

Other Builder Guy - Yeah, are you a teacher ? Here ?

Seraph - ( bewildered ) ..... ummmmmm .... yes. Can I help you ?

BG - Yeah - my calculator has gone missing !

OBG - Yeah !

S - ( more bewildered ) Right.

BG - It was down here by the fence ( gestures to HUGE feck-off fence to keep kids from running riot in building zone ).

S - I see.

BG - But now it's gone !

S - Yeah.

( slight pause )

BG - We need it !

OBG - For working out measurements !

BG - We can't do the stuff we need to do without it !

S - Ooooooookay.

( slight pause )

S - What would you like me to do ?

BG - Could you get it back ?

S - ( supressing urge to tell Builder Guy to go to Hell ) ...Right - well, did you see who took it ?

BG - Nope.

S - .... Okay - that DOES make things more tricky.

OBG - We saw some kids run THAT way ( pointing to D-Block - huge series of English class rooms and a library )

S - ... Right.

OBG - And in THERE ! ( points to toilets )

S - Yeah, those are toilets - and they're locked right now. I don't think anyone's going to be hiding in there ...

OBG - But I SAW kids running in there !

S - Gotcha. Ummm ... well, this is a main thoroughfare through the school. ANYone could have taken it. I'm not sure there's a lot I can do...

OBG - We saw kids run UP THERE !

S - Yeah, there are class rooms up there. Students tend to run up there all the time.

BG - Well - we saw kids running that way. ( points up again )

OBG - They RAN. UP there.

S - Okay, I tell you what - I'll ask the classes up there quickly if anyone's seen it. I'm kinda running late for my last class now, so if that doesn't work, I don't think I can help you any more than that, sorry.

BG - That's okay mate.

OBG - ( mumbling ) They RAN up there ....


The weird thing was - the second class I knocked on, a year nine kid pulls out the calculator and hands it right over. He thought some student had dropped it and was going to take it to lost property right after class.

Meh - he had an honest face. I believe him.

4 comments:

Jack Dee said...

Yeah this proves that all those maths teacher who told me back in 3td form that I had to learn long divison without a calculator were liars.
every who needs to uses a calculator.

teaching any maths Seraph ?

Seraph said...

Au contraire my friend ! If said Builder Guys HAD been able to do long division ( or whatever equation they needed to run ) in their heads, it would have saved me from having to retrieve their goddamn calculator for them !

Me ? TEACH maths ?? HA HA HA HA HA !!! Surely you JEST ! ... No - no maths teaching for me. At times I wish I did - it does seem that it's a hell of a lot easier to do than teach English. More boring perhaps ... but easier !

BubbaJay said...

Builders are a lot better a maths than you may think.
How else would a 2 hour job to repair a storm damaged ceiling cost almost EXACTLY the same as the new series of Holden Commodore sports ute (with optional 78' plasma screen in the tray).

Fuckers....

Jack Dee said...

Mathematics for Kiwi builders,

Part 1

If 1 pinky finger gets you $ 10,000 ACC
and a thumb is worth $ 15,000 how much compo will you get if you cut your entire hand of at the wrist ?